Stellar Blade Review – Jiggle Physics, Insane Combat & Why It’s a Must-Play in 2025

POV: I am obsessed with this game and it’s jiggle physics (ofcourse) and the actions the puzzles uff, Hats off.
And you got flashy sword-swinging action and thirst traps — plus buttery-smooth combat, existential crises, and plot twists that kinda make you

question humanity (and also your GPU’s thirst levels).

Let’s talk about the most unapologetically extra action game of the year.
Let’s talk Stellar Blade.


🎮 What Even Is Stellar Blade?

Picture this: Earth is toast. Humanity is hiding out in space colonies. Evil alien-cyborg hybrids called NA:tives are wrecking shop down below. Enter: Eve — elite soldier, flawless fashion icon, and possibly the last hope for humanity (no pressure, girl).

She crash-lands on Earth to clean up the mess and ends up caught between saving mankind, questioning authority, and dealing with mysterious characters who may or may not be giving “final boss” vibes.

Also… there’s “plot.”
And by plot we mean jiggle physics that’d make Dead or Alive blush.
Yes, the camera is down horrendously. And no, it does not apologize. Ever.


⚔️ Combat So Good, It Slaps (Literally)

The moment-to-moment gameplay? Peak dopamine.
Real players call it:

“Like a dance… ambush, parry, combo, execute.” – r/stellarblade

“Dark Souls meets Nioh with anime drip.” – r/Indiangamers

It’s tight, fast-paced, skill-based combat with precise dodges, juicy parries, and combo chains that feel chef’s kiss satisfying.
You’ll get smacked if you button mash, but once you hit the flow? You’re untouchable.

And yes, unlockable skills let you go from “clumsy cosplayer” to “anime final boss” in one glow-up.


🍑 Let’s Address the Elephant in the Bodysuit

You can’t talk about Stellar Blade without talking about Eve.
And when she moves? She moves.
Every step, slash, and sidestep comes with enough bounce to launch satellites.

“Butt admiration aside… the trip I had playing through this game was a once-in-a-lifetime experience.” – r/stellarblade

“It’s unapologetically sexy but also legitimately good.” – r/PS5

The devs knew exactly what they were doing — and leaned in hard.
Yes, it’s fanservice central. No, it’s not for everyone. But if you embrace the chaos? It’s honestly iconic.


⏱️ Playtime & Replayability

  • Main story: 25–30 hours
  • Completionist? 40+ hours easy
  • NG+ (New Game Plus): You’ll want to replay it, trust.

“Played through 4 times back to back… now on my 5th.” – r/stellarblade

“I got every outfit and I still want more.” – r/videogames

There’s tons of side content, secret bosses, endings, and alternate outfits (which… let’s just say you will go hunting for).


🎵 Vibes, Music & Visual Overload

Visuals: GORGEOUS. Eve’s animations? Smooth. Worlds? Atmospheric. Bosses? Big and scary.
Music: Gets you in the zone, but some tracks loop a little too much.

“The soundtrack is absolutely fantastic.” – r/PS5

“The game is just so freaking polished. From combat to UI to environment.” – r/PlayStation

Even critics agree it’s one of the cleanest debuts ever for a new IP. Like damn, Shift Up popped off.


📉 The Flaws (Because Nothing’s Perfect, Except Eve)

  • Side quests? Mostly fetchy and repetitive.
  • Story? Starts strong, dips in the middle, ends… okay.
  • Endings? “The secret one slaps. The others? Meh.” – r/videogames
  • Camera? Thirsty. Like… embarrassingly thirsty. You’re either into it or constantly adjusting it away from Eve’s… y’know.

🧠 Gamer Reactions IRL

Asmongold called the combat “surprisingly clean” and praised the enemy variety.
CohhCarnage was “skeptical at first,” then “lowkey addicted.”
Reddit is obsessed with the game’s flow and polish:

“One of my favorite combat systems in a long time. It just feels so good.” – r/PS5

“In a couple years this’ll be a cult classic, mark my words.” – r/Indiangamers


🔥 Final Verdict: Dope or Nope?

Combat that slaps
Boss fights that go hard
Graphics that devour AAA games for breakfast
Booty physics on a NASA-level trajectory
Eve supremacy

Sure, the story dips, and the side missions are kind of filler.
But when you’re gliding through a post-apocalyptic wasteland while parrying deathbots in slow-mo with k-pop vibes in the background?
Yeah. That’s not just dope — that’s DELUXE dope.


Score: 9.1/10

Because sometimes, a game doesn’t have to be perfect.
It just needs to be fun, flashy, and unapologetically itself.
And Stellar Blade? She understood the assignment.

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